Things in my house that don't work

There are a few things in my house that have broken or are breaking: 1) the main kitchen light blew a long time ago...I do dishes by touch 2) the breakfast area light blew shortly after that 3) the dishwasher...not working, it is newish but not covered under warranty 4) the disposall...is just worn out 5) the garage door...has a big dent 6) the house phone...went kaput 7) one of the exterior lights can't be changed until I figure out how to remove the broken light bulb 8) the electronic car key...went kaput 9) the lawnmower blade needs to be sharpened...but the blade was welded on by the last repair shop so Mr. Caboodle can't remove it 10) the bedroom floor...has no flooring 11) the hairdryer...was mauled by Boy Caboodle 12) my body...currently, my neck* Things that have been fixed or replaced lately: 1) the washing machine is new...the old one finally gave up the ghost 2) the iron is new...the old one...let's just say it was really, really OLD Things that work perfectly or get the job done: 1) if it's not new, it's not working! ok, that was a skewed list. Let that be a lesson to me! Do not spend all extra monies on yarn, cloth, and underwear. Must.save.for.repairs. *I was going to list Mr. Caboodle but he really does work. Not around the house mind you...but he slogs it out at the office everyday and takes Boy Caboodle off my frayed ends when he can.